6 Ways to Help Your Kids with Doubt

Doubt is a common struggle in the Christian life, especially with young people. As they grow and mature, they stop asking what and start asking why. They stop taking things for granted and start examining things for themselves. Because of this, we as Christian parents need to be serious in our effort to help our kids overcome the doubt they’re struggling with.

As someone has been raised in church my whole life, I know what it’s like to have serious doubts that stay hidden. And as I’ve grown and matured in my walk with Christ, I’ve experienced both helpful and harmful approaches to conquering doubt. As you desire to raise up the next generation to love Christ and honor his Word, consider these six suggestions:

Walk through the doubt with them

If your kid is struggling with doubt, she needs your help knowing how to navigate those doubts. First, help your kid identify the source of the doubt. Is it a doubt rooted in morality, emotion, or intellect? Second, help them seriously consider the alternative. If what they’re doubting is, in fact, not true, how would that impact their understanding of the world?

For example, if God doesn’t exist, how does that change my view of reality or morality? Third, evaluate their information consumption. Where are they getting more of their information? Who are the loudest voices in their lives? Fourth, help them pray about their doubts. Rather than wrestle with doubts alone, help them bring them to the throne of grace. The psalmists did this all the time. Finally, show them what it looks like to trust God even with doubts.

Don’t just teach them the Bible, teach them how to study the Bible.

Helping our kids memorize verses and remember all the important Bible stories is about as much as you can ask for when they’re young. But as they get older, we need to teach them how to interpret and study the Word of God for themselves. If everything they know about the Bible has simply been fed to them, what’s to stop them from doubting their faith?

As a dad, my instruction to my kids should extend beyond “Make sure you’re reading your Bible.” At the proper age, I should be teaching them how to consider the context of a passage and how to understand the overarching themes of the Bible so that they can see how each verse fits into the greater story line.

If you want your teen to cling to the faith long after he leaves the house, you must teach him how to study the Bible so that he “may be complete, equipped for every good work” (2 Tim 3:17)

Expose them to other worldviews

As parents, we’re scared to death of exposing our kids to the vain and godless philosophies of the world. But if we don’t, we’ll lose them. First, come to grips with the fact that it is impossible to shelter them. They’re hearing the philosophy of the world all around them, from the innocent kids’ show on Netflix to their friends at school.

Second, realize that one of the most helpful things you can do for your kids is to train them how to contrast Christianity with opposing worldviews while they’re still in the context of a loving home or church. Don’t dumb down other worldviews, either. Don’t simply describe evolution as something “only idiots believe.” Don’t caricature other religions based on their worst manifestation.

Our kids are not too young to start being trained in Christian apologetics. Give them honest information. Let them know that there are smart, educated people who think Christianity is a joke, and then help them wrestle through the objections.

Then help them see how Christianity is the only worldview that makes sense of the world and how all other worldviews fall flat. Lead them to the point where they can honestly say with Peter in John 6:68, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”

Help them feel comfortable asking the big questions

I don’t care how many verses your kid has memorized, how many times she has been to camp, or how involved he is at church, your kid is struggling with some big questions: Does God really exist? How do I know the Bible is true? Is Christianity really the only way? Do I really believe that non-Christians will spend eternity in hell?

Rather than pretending like these will never be questions my kids struggle with, it’s better to simply assume they are (or will be) and preemptively explore these questions with them. Your kid probably doesn’t feel comfortable admitting that he has these questions, and so he may be wrestling in silence. Don’t assume that your kid isn’t struggling just because he’s one of the “good kids.”

Instead, create an environment in your home where your kids feel comfortable asking the tough questions. Assure them that voicing their doubts will be met, not with surprise or confrontation, but with grace and love.

Teach them the importance of the local church

Christianity isn’t designed to work in isolation. God gives us the local church so that “we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes” (Eph. 4:14).

If our kids don’t grasp the importance of church, they’ll see no reason to stick around once the decision is up to them. Without the daily exhortation of fellow believers, they will “be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin” (Heb. 3:13). The key is, your local church needs to be a place where the gospel is actively working, which leads me to my final, and perhaps most important point.

Let them witness Gospel power

Do your kids see the Gospel clearly at work? Have they witnessed first-hand the transformative power of the Gospel by watching your marriage or how you treat them as children? If you want your kids to overcome doubt, then give them no reason to doubt the power of the Gospel.

If a teen finds himself in a church where the Gospel is simply talked about but not lived out; if he finds himself in a home where the Gospel seems to have little impact on the parents’ marriage or family, why in the world would he want to cling to such a gospel after he leaves those environments? Read this carefully: do not expect the gospel to be real to your kids if it isn’t real to you. If allegiance to Christ is simply taught and not caught, don’t be surprised when the younger generation tosses out Christianity completely.

Praise the Lord that his grace is greater than our doubts! While it can be unsettling when doubts arise from our own kids, we shouldn’t be surprised. And we shouldn’t be afraid! God has given us every tool we need to help our kids navigate doubt without shipwrecking their faith.