Help Your Teen Find God's Will

The adolescent years are a pivotal time. So much is changing and shifting, and that’s actually a wonderful, stretching, growing place to be for a believing teen. They are, as Jesus did, growing physically, mentally, spiritually and socially (Luke 2:52).

They are about to face some big decisions, too. And many of them are starting to ask this simple but important question: how do I know what God’s will is for my life? That overarching question spawns lots of more specific ones. Who will I marry? Where will I go to college (or should I)? What is my career path? How am I supposed to know?!

If your teens are asking those questions, that’s a really good thing. They are maturely thinking about the future. But they can also feel pretty lost about what to do next or how to know. Many carry internal stress about these future decisions. They want to follow God’s path, but they just aren’t sure how to find it.

Psalm 37: A Simple Mindset

This is obviously a huge topic for parents to tackle. There are a seemingly infinite number of talking points that need attention, both philosophical and practical. My goal here is not to exhaustively cover this topic—that would be impossible in a short blog post! This article shouldn’t be viewed as a one-stop guide for aiding our teens in discovering God’s will for them. But I would like to focus, at least, on a straightforward mindset we can encourage in our teens. How should I think about all these uncertain decision points coming my way?

I love Psalm 37. David wrote this psalm at a time when he was facing a lot of uncertainty. In his case, his future was cloudy due to human enemies actively seeking his bodily harm. Our teens hopefully aren’t facing that (at least not to the degree David did!), but the uncertainty of what’s around the corner for them is just as real. I’ve found verses 3-7 to be a massive encouragement to teens. It’s a bite-sized mindset guide about what they’re facing and about to face. I’m convinced that this passage can serve as a great “home base” for their thinking.

These simple verses answer two questions. First, what must I do to follow God’s will for me? What is my role? I’m not just sitting around with nothing to do while I wait for God to somehow miraculously communicate his plan for me. There are some specific mindsets and actions I must commit to even as I wait for him to direct me. But the passage joyfully answers the flip-side of that question, too. It tells us what God will do—what his role is in this process of finding his path for me.

What Must I Do?

Psalm 37:3-7 provides five different mindsets or actions for our teens that will ensure they will be guidable and responsive to God’s gracious leading. These five things actually benefit them far beyond the topic of God’s will! A teen who develops these habits will be a healthy believer in all the ways!

• Trust (v.3): Trust God! This is where it all begins. Trusting God means acknowledging that his plan for me is best, that he is powerful enough to bring it about, and that it is amazingly good for me because he loves me so much. Remind your teens of what they know about their God. If they can trust him with their greatest need that Jesus met, then they can trust that same loving, caring God with all other aspects of their lives. If they can trust Jesus with their ultimate future, they can trust him with their immediate future too. What they know about their God can and should lead to peaceful trust.
• Obey (v.3): David says to trust the Lord—and then to do good! Obey him. Do what you know he has called you to do right now. Obey and honor your parents. Read his Word, pray, and be with God’s people. Develop friendships that help you grow. Be diligent in school, preparing for future service to their King. Stay pure in mind and body. The list goes on. Believing teens know what God has for them to do right now. Do those things with joy and submission today, and then do them tomorrow!
• Delight (v.4): Delight in God. Grow in your knowledge of him and love for him. Get to know him daily in his Word. Ask him to reveal himself to you. Make him your most important relationship. This verse makes it sound like, if I delight in God, he’ll give me that Corvette or boyfriend or job I want. What David is saying is that, as I delight in God, I will want the right things. He will make his desires mine.
• Commit (v.5): Yield my way to his. Humbly admit that, left to my own desires and plans, I’ll just make a mess of things. He knows what is truly good infinitely better than I do, and he is capable of bringing it to pass. I don’t really want my way; I want his. Teens that grasp that truth spare themselves so much grief!
• Rest! (v. 7). Calmly be still as you wait for him to guide you. Don’t fret, don’t worry, don’t rush things, don’t get ahead of the game. He’s revealed all the truths you know about him so that you’d believe them and find rest in your soul. Our teens don’t need to carry the stress of their futures; God carries all that for them!

What Does God Do?

Look at the phrases David uses in this passage to depict God’s role in their future. Spend some time reviewing each of them with your teen, rejoicing together in what God says he will do! This passage provides just a few highlights.

One way to translate the end of verse 3 is “find safe pasture.” As I trust him, he will guide me on safe, good paths (Psalm 23:2–3). He will! His Old Testament people saw the Promised Land he gave them as a sure sign of his favor and blessing on them. Your teens enjoy the same wonderful provision from the same Shepherd.

We already saw what God will do when we delight in him. He will make his desires yours. So, in a real sense, if your teen is truly walking with God and earnestly growing in their delight in him—if he is their greatest love in an ever-growing way—then encourage them to do what they want! Trust that the truth of this verse is real.

I love what verse 5 says about what God will do. Very simply, as I trust him, he will act! What does that mean? That means he will take care of everything. He will guide you. He will continue the work of changing you even more into what he wants of you (v.6). He will make sure you end up where he wants you. He will direct you to the right spouse or college choice. He will place his desire for a career path within you and then pave the way for it to happen. What an awesome, sovereign, loving, caring Good Shepherd! Good thing too, because these sheep need all the help we can get!

Conclusion

What about when I am genuinely pursuing all that and things still aren’t clear? I’ve been there! I’ve learned that he will act. He will close doors and open others at just the right time—his time. He won’t let you end up in the wrong spot as long as you’re trusting, obeying, delighting, committing and resting!

This doesn’t answer every question teens have about the will of God for them. But it does give them the mindset to have today as they seek it. Dads, let’s encourage our teens in the reality of God’s sovereign goodness. He doesn’t find cruel pleasure in making things obscure or uncertain. No, he’s full of love. He is invested in using us for his glory, and that plan always is for our good.

Let’s encourage them to commit to their part, however. There is plenty they can and must do now! Encourage them to trust, obey, and delight today. And tomorrow. And the day after that. And years down the road they’ll be able to look back and see how he led them all the way.