Help! I have a teenager!
A few weeks ago, a friend shared with me how they celebrated their son’s birthday a few days ago, and now they had … a teenager. With a deep sigh and a note of exasperation, her next words were something to the effect of, “I don’t know what to do.” It was like her son had mutated into a new creature, this thing called, ‘teenager’.
Do you share her fears? The teenage years can be the scariest years of parenting; they can be a tumultuous time for both parents and teens. Everything, it seems, changes. The internal shifts (in things like emotions, hormones, logic, values) reshape many external things, like relationships and attitudes.
Though these years can be challenging, teens aren’t mutant ninja turtles, and they aren’t half-human either. They are precious souls made in God’s image who are undergoing some of the biggest changes of their lives.
Their emotional, physical, and mental development often affects the spiritual realm as teens wrestle to make their faith their own. They face strong temptations and spiritual pitfalls during these years. My greatest spiritual struggles took place roughly between the years of 12 and 16. And that was before iPhones, the homosexual and transgender revolution, and “the anxious generation”. Teenage life today is more complex than ever before.
As fathers, we cannot shy away from our responsibility to guide our cherished, gangly teens through these often stormy years. While we can’t force them to love the Lord, we can keep leading them to the Lord. That means we must strive to give them biblical answers to their questions and feed them with mature, age-appropriate instruction from Scripture. We can’t ignore hard or complex topics; we need to show our teens that the Bible addresses even the most difficult and sensitive issues.
One major obstacle that we fathers face is knowing what to say or where to go in Scripture to help our teenager wrestle through these things. That’s why I am so happy to introduce you to a new set of resources called “LifeLine for Teens”. These booklets are aimed directly at teens to help them address the unique spiritual challenges they face.
Kelly Collier, series editor and author, shares her heart behind these resources:
“While a variety of mini-books are written about teen issues, few resources are written directly to teens. This series aims to meet the needs of both teens and those engaged in discipling teens (parents, youth pastors, mentors, etc.) by providing short, easy to read, practical guides that address current teen issues with hope and help from God’s Word.”
Each book begins with the word “help” in the title, then lists the topic the booklet will address, such as “Help! I’m Doubting” or “Help! I Need to Forgive”. The authors construct the titles to communicate a positive tone and trajectory. Each booklet follows the same general template: chapter 1 describes the problem; chapters 2 and 3 unpacks the biblical solution, which gives hope to the reader; and chapter 4 gives practical instruction on how to live it out. These books are accessible to anyone because the books are 50 pages or less!
The series is designed not just for teens to read by themselves, but with a spiritual mentor. At Growing Fathers, we recognize that we (along with our wives) are the primary disciple-makers of our children. Most of us probably wouldn’t know where to start on a topic like gender confusion, but these booklets give us both a starting place and a guide through Scripture, aimed at the heart of the teen. Jim Newcomer, one of the authors and the theological editor for the series, says,
“These mini-books are anchored to the sufficiency of Scripture, the promises of the gospel, and the goal of Christlikeness. Each booklet is a road map for teens and parents alike to walk together in navigating sin, establishing spiritual disciplines, and having hope after failures.”
Currently, there are 12 books in the series, addressing gender confusion, anxiety, shame, purity, authority, leadership, depression, Bible study, forgiveness, assurance of salvation, loneliness and living for Jesus. Each of the books also comes with several companion resources on the website.
Full disclosure, I have had the privilege of writing two books in this series, but that’s not why I recommend these resources. These booklets are both helpful and hope-filled. They are helpful, giving us biblical teaching on subjects that are both urgent and difficult. They are hope-filled, showing how the power of Jesus in the gospel can change anyone, even those in deep distress or having failure in their past.
Yes, the teenage years can test the faith of any teen and parent, but by God’s grace you do not walk through these years alone. The LifeLine for Teens resources will not magically solve all your teenager’s problems or answer all their questions, but they can be a valuable tool in your parenting toolbox.